Comparing

When was the last time you compared yourself or your situation, to someone else or their situation?

I do this way more often that I'd like to.

Whenever I do it, there's always a layer of judgement. A feeling of better than or worse than.

Ironically, neither feeling feels good.

I want to talk about comparison and why it's so flawed.

***

So much of what drives us is invisible to others.

Think of everything that's going on in your head right now.

Ok, perhaps not everything, but even some things.

There are some things that are going on in your head right now, that you haven't told anyone about, yet (or maybe ever).

Those things might be getting in your way or the may be paving your way. Either way, they are completely invisible to others.

***

When we compare ourselves to others, if we really want to make it a fair comparison, we must account for the invisible drivers too.

But that's impossible to do, isn't it?

If you wish you were more like someone else, what you're really wishing for is simply the surface of what that person appears to be.

Their anxieties, their fears, their doubts, their goals, and their preferences are all unknown to you.

If you were magically able to make those things known, perhaps you might not actually wish to be that person anymore.

***

If you go on Apple's website and you wanted to compare two of their products—which is very easy to do—you would get a side-by-side breakdown of all the features and benefits of each.

When we try to compare ourselves to others, it's like we're just looking at the picture on top of the comparison table. Most of the data underneath is missing.

Comparison to another person is inherently flawed.

Just keep this in mind the next time you do it.